My partner Alex and I decided we wanted to do a birth class but something that was in line with my beliefs and thought process on what we wanted the labour and birth experience to feel like. My partner has two children already and had birth experiences that were not remembered in a positive or beautiful nature. The words he used to describe these births were what I had heard a million times before - painful, hectic, scary, intense. These were not words I wanted to remember our birth by.
Alex and I spent the day with Tracey taking part in the Calmbirth experience and I can not explain the sense of empowerment and knowledge we had by the time we had left that day. Alex felt so excited and confident in the role he was going to play. It feels nice for the birthing partner to know his or her role as you don't feel so helpless. I left Tracey after our session feeling calm and ready to bring my baby into this world.
For a first time mother about to embark on this journey , I was completely at peace and knew I had the skills and knowledge to help create the birth story I wanted.
You can not control so many things about labour and birth of baby, but you do have the power to take charge of your mind, thought process, breathing, understanding how it all works and why everything is happening. This made me feel very confident and at ease.
The day it all started for Alex and I, I had lost my mucus plug at 5am and instead of feeling like emergency we are going to have a baby, Alex and I were prepared and informed and knew this was a great sign but to just go about our day. Alex headed to work and I stayed in bed as the pre labour contractions started. I used the skills and breathing I had learnt from Tracey and continued to pre labour at home all day. In and out of the bath, over a fit ball, showers, eating regularly, reading our booklet we had from the class and knowing exactly what we were doing. Alex and I stayed at home until 8pm that night when my waters broke and I was no longer speaking and my energy had changed from chatting away to now I was in the zone to birth a baby.
Alex had everything ready, just as we had been advised, fuel in the car, bags packed, capsule installed, snacks just incase, phones charged - we were ready to go. It took him a while to get me down the stairs and into the car as I was having contractions very regularly lasting up to a minute and the icing on the cake - I had back labour, baby was posterior and I couldn't understand why it felt like my back was broken.
I was only able to be in one position and that was hands and knees my back was killing me but I kept myself calm and used my breathing to get me through every contraction. I am not going to lie , I was in a lot of pain, but not for a minute did I let my mind wander into negative thoughts or into fear - I stayed connected to my baby and I knew that all of this pain was going to result in this baby that I've wanted and waited for all of these months.
We arrived at the hospital at 8:45pm and the walk from the car park to the birth suite feels like it took an eternity, waters leaking, contractions so regularly I was only able to walk a little at a time, clenching onto Alex and the handrail, slow and steadily we made it.
We walked into birth suite and were greeted by my midwife and taken into our room. 3 hours of back labour, pushing, breathing, connecting to our baby, I did not speak, I stayed completely silent and all of the things I had learnt in our session with Tracey were running through my mind. Alex was by my side supporting me, and at 12:10am we had our beautiful 8.3 pound baby girl, without drugs, without intervention and she was healthy and beautiful and we were so proud of ourselves. We did it!! I'm a mum, I couldn't believe it. We did not know babies sex so a little girl was such a surprise and the most beautiful moment of my life.
I am so thankful for the preparation and the class with Tracey as I will always remember the birth of Autumn as a beautiful one.
Abagaile & Alex
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